Many hands make light work. Helping people is rewarding. Team work works. But is together is better?
I love getting involved with a team or a community and working together to achieve a common goal. But I think attachment and clinginess to a group is destructive for the individual.
Anthony De Mello has a good quote, he says:
Loneliness is when you’re missing people, aloneness is when you’re enjoying yourself.
I think loneliness occurs because we are attached to other people. You can be lonely in a crowd of people. You can also be alone in a crowd of people. Loneliness is debilitating. Aloneness is empowering.
Together is great but it can be dangerous too… We limit ourselves if we care too much about what other people think. I see it in myself – I put things off because I’m afraid of what other people think. Having said that, I do a lot of things that are just for me, that I don’t need approval for – meditation, journaling, this blog (kind of…), reading, exercise.
I think by cultivating aloneness in our lives, we are better able to contribute and work together. The more we cultivate it, the less attached we are to the approval of a group, and the less lonely we feel. .